Sunrise Learning Lab: 9/11/01

Assuming that there are some others out there like me, there are certain topics that you just don't feel comfortable with addressing head-on with your children.
As the tenth anniversary of the September 11th terrorist attacks approach, it is starting to feel like an elephant in the room...

The boys have been in the room when the tenth anniversary of September 11th has been mentioned either on television or on the Internet when I open up my browser.

Somehow, know it is something that has to be addressed, discussed, explained, etc. but I do not feel quite comfortable with tackling the topic with the boys.

Big Bro had mentioned that on a channel for kids, there was something about September 11th and he wanted to know what happened.
Honestly, I acted as if I did not hear him, because frankly, I don't quite know what I want to say about that day. Think that he sensed that somehow, I did not want to explore that topic, as instead of him repeating the question, he just moved on and took out a puzzle. I know that it probably is not the best way to handle something...to act as if you don't hear what is being asked, but I really needed to take some time to think and gather my thoughts as to how we are going to explain this topic to the boys...and whether or not we should explain it to both boys now or just to Big Bro, as he is the one who was curious about what happened. Little Bro has not mentioned September 11th at all, even though he was in the room when the topic was very briefly mentioned on one of the kids' television channels...

Part of me wants to share in very general terms what happened...

Then, part of me wants to tell the boys how Mommy and Daddy spent the day together just a few blocks from The Pentagon, sitting with a classroom of children in the dark, and then, part of me just does not yet feel like it is the appropriate time to disclose all that happened on that horrific day.

I can still smell the smoke, hear the sirens, and picture how the day played out for us there so close to The Pentagon.

When tough subjects have had to be addressed (by me), I usually feel better writing out my thoughts and then, handing them to the intended person to read. Then, we discuss what I have read and our feelings on the topic. Actually think that that is one reason why I enjoy blogging, as it gives me a voice but I can write down my thoughts and feelings. They don't have to come directly from my mouth. While writing can be raw and packed with emotion, it also can be more controlled, more reflective, more organized. You as the writer can take as much or as little time as you choose to take to edit, delete, re-word, etc.
Almost would like to do that with this topic, namely, to carefully map out what I would like to share with them and then, just have the boys read my thoughts on the day.

Someone sent me a link to a website called Brain Pop that has a whole animated piece about 9/11.
This video clip tells the story and spares all of the horror and some of the reality of the day.
It is a boy recounting what happened to a sad looking robot.
This clip is not at all graphic...no blood or shots of total devastation...which is good, in some respects, in that it shares the facts without being too graphic or emotional for a young child.
While this piece explains, it does not really provoke a child to ask more about the day...it might work as part of the explanation of the day, but there needs to be more...do like that this clip starts with a disclaimer at the beginning that it should be something watched with an adult and that it is a sensitive topic...

Then, I think of a former colleague who lost her dear brother on that day and how she is now a parent...
When her little one is old enough, she will have to explain to him how her brother (whom she just adored and admired) died on that fateful day.
Am sure that she will not be having her child get the news by watching a video clip...
She will have to tell him and then, she will have to share photos and stories of their lives together.
Thinking of my colleague from my teaching days back on that day makes me want to share more about how many people's lives were changed and despite the devastation, that life is worth living.
Want to also share that we need to continue to have a sense of strong faith and love for one another after such a tragedy.

Also timely is that in Roman Catholic circles, today (9/8/01) is the Feast Day of the Birth of Mary, considered to be the Blessed Mother of Jesus.
So, for those of you who are either a practicing Catholic family or else possibly if you were raised in a Catholic family, you know and can share with those around you about how Mary was a woman of such strong faith and love. We need to all take lessons from such a strong woman of faith and love.

Regardless of our individual religious preferences, we ALL need to diligently learn to love one another and to work for peace.

We need to remember The Golden Rule and to realize that violence and terrorism are the enemy, not a particular religion.

To finally get rid of this particular elephant in the room, we need to acknowledge it, address it, and model for our children how to be loving, gentle souls despite what the world whips at us at times.

We need to continue to highlight the importance of working towards having a greater understanding for the world and its people. We need to continue to honor the memory of those Americans and Foreign Nationals who lost their lives, as well as to honor the lives of the survivors who made it through the day and the years that followed losing their loved ones in this tragedy.

Will try to do a follow up within the next few days, but after writing this, think that the elephant will be expelled very soon from our home.

UPDATE: We spoke with the boys about 9/11/01 and it went very well.

If you click on the highlighted sections in this blog post, it will take you first to my blog post last year about how September 11th played out for Dear Hubby and me, and my thoughts on the day from the nine year anniversary...

Then, if you click where it mentions Brain Pop in this post, it will take you to the video that gives a run down of what happened. It is a possible way to start to open discussion with your children, although you most likely will want to add to what the video presents so that they reflect on peace instead of the time line.

Please continue to pray for those who lost loved ones on September 11th, or who survived but hold many emotional scars from witnessing first hand what happened on that day. There are some who still struggle day-to-day with this loss.

Please also pray that those in power will actually take into consideration what Dr. Sanjay Gupta shared with respect to there being a connection between 9/11, first responders, and cancer...
If there is any chance that there is a causal relationship between inhaling all of that horrible ash from the day and cancer, please pray that treatments for these particular cancer ridden folks will be considered to be a covered condition. It should not have to be proven beyond all reasonable doubt...these first responders were the heroes of the day, as well as the weeks and months that followed, so if there is even a sliver of a chance that their ailments were due to them being selfless and dedicated, then by all means, give them coverage for cancer treatments.

Also pray that there will be consideration for those still hoping that there will be more of a concerted effort to continue to dig through the fresh kills area near Ground Zero. While I respect that Mayor Bloomberg does not want the area to be known anymore as Ground Zero and wants there to be positive change in that area, people who lost their loved ones still want this to be a place of respect and reverence.

Finally, my blog was criticized a few weeks ago by someone for not being relevant to Montessori, because I discuss topics on my blog that are not strictly Montessori.

Dr. Maria Montessori was a peacemaker and devoted her life to working with children in a way that was respectful towards them, as well as demonstrative of how to live life in a peaceful, loving way. Think that if she were alive and shared her thoughts about the events of September 11th, that she would call for a prayer for peace and would want adults to present things in a way about the day that would not scare them, but would get them to think, to reflect, and to honor those who died in the attacks.

I do plan to share with you about the lovely work that the boys have been doing, but sometimes, there are more important life lessons than just showing you shots of what happens to be on our shelves at the moment...hope that you will agree with me on this...

On September 11th, 2001, I was teaching 4 and 5 year old children in a school that sits approximately three miles from The Pentagon.
It was our first week of school, our third day of school to be exact.
My little kindergarten students were in their reading groups, getting ready to work with English language objects.
I had an exceptionally young group that particular year, although they turned out to be so wise and calm, way beyond their ages...
I had 16 students and a full time teaching assistant.
Half of my class was Latino and knew little to no English.
My assistant had a group of eight children and so did I.
We were just getting started with our activities when we heard a weird message on the intercom.
Thought how odd it was that they interrupted my class with this peculiar message, as it seemed like something they should have just sent someone from the office down to the particular room to pass on this message.
Well, as I looked at my assistant, she and I both kind of shrugged our shoulders and then, she said,
"You know, when I was hired years ago, I think that what that message said is a code for something."
I told her that that had not been discussed during my orientation, as I was brand new at the school and had just started to work there that year...
So, she went and dug out her old, worn handbook and as she flipped through the pages, I came up with little "sponge activities" to keep two tables of children in their seats until we could decipher what the message meant.

As she found the page, her face turned pale and I knew that something was horribly wrong.

She had me read the interpretation of the coded message and it read something along the lines of:
Eminent Terrorist Threat. In building or in immediately surrounding area of building. Lock doors and windows. Turn out lights. Put all children on the floor, as far as you can from the windows and doors. Do not make any noise whatsoever...

Because of our close proximity to The Pentagon, they must have had the foresight that they would need to have a way to notify classrooms without causing mass hysteria.

My assistant and I quickly complied and got all of these tiny children onto the floor.
We decided to tell them that it was like "the silence game", as we did not want them to cry or to be petrified. It was so dark in our room, and these little ones were so new to school...we did not know how it was going to work to keep them there.
Plus, at this moment, and for about the next hour or so, my assistant and I actually thought that the terrorists were in our building.
We sat there, totally quiet and in the dark, with all of our students doing the same and amazingly, no one asking to use the bathroom or even questioning why we were sitting there in the dark.
It was so eerie to be sitting there, wondering if the terrorists were outside our door.
The darkness was compounded by the sounds of the emergency vehicles and sirens that seemed to be going off virtually all around us.
Somehow, by the Grace of God, we all remained calm and exceptionally quiet and still.
It was if by Divine Intervention / and maybe a little intuition, too, that the children knew what to do, as well as possibly, by the example that my assistant and I were trying to lead.
The instructions in the old handbook said that we were not to make any noise whatsoever, so we did not, but am quite certain that prayers were being said by at least myself and my assistant, as well as by some if not all of the children.

After about a couple hours of or so of being on the floor, lo and behold, right at my classroom door, was Dear Hubby. (Dear Hubby and I were not married as of then, but had been dating for a while.)
Back then, he worked in an office in very close proximity to The White House and so, when they evacuated D.C., he took the Metro as far as he could take it until they then closed down the Metro, at which point he was left stuck in Virginia without a way home. So, he decided to walk to my school.
Dear Hubby was one of the few people actually allowed into the school building, as the building was in total lock down mode, but my principal knew Dear Hubby through me, as he and I were dating at the time, and he had a U.S. Government ID so she felt it would be okay to let him in and that if necessary, not only could he help me with my class, but he could help if we had to evacuate the building.
So, Dear Hubby came into the school and to my room, and then, he filled my assistant and me in on what was going on, both in New York and D.C.
None of us knew about what had happened in PA at this time.
My assistant then worried about what her children and her grandchild would be doing, as the entire area close to the Pentagon and all of D.C. was being evacuated, so I gave her permission to try to make an outgoing call.
None of our cell phones could get an outside line.
Now that we knew that the terrorists were not actually in our particular building, I let her leave the classroom to go across the hallway to the workroom that was there to use a phone that was in there for emergencies.
She was able to get an outside line there and left a voice mail message telling her family that we were okay and that they should just do for themselves until we were told we could leave.
I then was able to use this same phone and called and left a voice mail message on the 800 number that went to my dad's workplace.
We did not have texting at the time, nor did any cell phones work...so using this emergency phone and leaving a couple of voice mails was the best we could do.

After several hours of having the children on the floor in the complete darkness, and without any food /drink / or bathroom breaks, I then sent Dear Hubby on a mission to go down the hall and to try to scrounge up some treats for the children and for us, as the kids were getting hungry but their cubbies were not accessible from where we were in the building.
He managed to round up some change and got a couple bags of M &M's and some pretzels.
We gave each child a few of these goodies and then, around this time, the school social worker came around and she said that we were to continue to stay calm and to keep the children in the dark until further notice, but that to tell them that they had to clean the playground and this is why the shades had to be shut and the lights had to be out...
Okay, whatever...
But that is what she was officially instructed to say to us and what we were to tell them if they asked.
My students did not ask, so we did not have to share this with them.

The social worker gave us permission to have a VCR on to show a movie.
Luckily, one of my students had brought two videos to share during circle time.
Each child was to bring in an item that represented love for circle time and this is what she had chosen to bring, as she loved these movies...
So, we put in her selections and let me tell you, having a movie to watch has never been a more perfect thing to do than at that moment. We kept it so low that it was essentially on mute and one of the children suggested that it was so that we could make up our own story to go with what they were saying...

Around this time, people began to swarm the school and wanted to take their children home.

The school was still trying to figure out how to handle this so once again, the school social worker showed up at my door and said that they would start to come to collect one child at a time and that as a child left the room, they would say, "Your Mom (or Dad or Grandparent) is here. You have a dentist appointment."
The whole goal was to prevent mass hysteria and so, this is why they wanted to use the one at a time approach to dismissing children.
Luckily, my students were young and did not question this at all when the social worker told them this.
Some of them seemed happy that they were going to get to go to the dentist.

They all left and actually said that they had liked doing "No words movie day in the dark."

As the time wore on, we were then allowed to turn on the bathroom light in our classrooms.
The light from the bathroom and from coming off of the Television was enough light for us to be able to see, so I read the couple of remaining students a book by Kevin Henkes called Wemberly Worried.

I had purchased the little stuffed Wemberly Mouse character that went with the book so one of the girls, who seemed to intuitively sense that something was amiss, began to hug the mouse and continued to cuddle it until her family came to get her from school.

We were told that as soon as every student was dismissed from our respective classrooms that we were to leave but to know in advance that many of the nearby roads were going to be blocked off so to just try to get to someplace that the roads will let you go...

When it was finally time for us to leave, we found out a few things:
One of my fellow colleagues' brothers was missing and presumed dead from the WTC, based on where he had last been heard from in the building.
Another fellow colleague was frantically trying to see if her parents were on the flight from Boston, as they were supposed to have been on that flight.
We also found out that there was virtually no way to get to my apartment at the time, as it was entirely blocked off and the only thing we could do is to try to head North to make our way to Dear Hubby's place.
So, that is what we did.
I had to stay there for the remainder of the week through the weekend.
So odd, as virtually everything was closed...
I had to borrow t-shirts from Dear Hubby as I did not have anything of mine with me for these days.
That night, as we laid there, it was so surreal.

Earlier in the day, as we were driving home, there was the continuous sound of sirens coming from buildings and from emergency vehicles. There were also the sounds of fighter jets (I am assuming that is what these were) but then, it went to a total and absolute silence.

No cars passing by, no airplanes overhead, and no emergency vehicles going by.

Just total quiet.

Hard to believe that so many years have passed.

Every 9/11 anniversary, I think of my dear former colleague who lost her brother whom she adored.
Also think of another wonderful former colleague who had worried that her parents had perished but then, got the best news of her life that they had missed the flight.
Think of my cousins, who worked near Ground Zero, but were not at their desks that particular morning.
Think of all of the Americans and Foreign Nationals who lost their lives that fateful day and extend my deepest sympathies to these families who lost loved ones.
Think of the smell of smoke spewing up from The Pentagon that permeated the air as we were trying to figure a route away from my school. The sounds of enumerable sirens blaring from buildings and emergency vehicles, as well as the sight of the billowing smoke and the smell still haunts me.
Then, think of the day when we returned to school and some of the children knew every detail whereas others did not know a thing and that we were somehow supposed to keep it that way.
Had children who constructed The Pentagon and the WTC and then, re-enacted the crashes and the people falling to their deaths with the blocks and finger puppets in my room.
Also, had children who chose to deal with this by drawing and painting images they had seen and heard about from their family.
We had to get counseling for some of the children, as they knew people either who had perished at The Pentagon or at the WTC.

Then, we had to try to redirect children away from working near any child who knew, as some families were adamant that they did not want their children to find out or know anything at all about this horrible day.
All in all, it was a life changing experience.

It made me ache to think that there are people out there who would hate the USA so much that they would be willing to do such a heinous act of terror against the people of this country I love.

My heart continues to go out to the families and friends who lost loved ones in such a senseless act of violence against America.

Dear Hubby and I formed an even closer bond through living and being together through this dark day, as it made me really feel so blessed to have such a wonderful, caring man in my life.

It also makes me proud that Dear Hubby has a role in trying to help to bring about change and good to a part of the world who seems to be so full of hatred.

United We Stand. One Nation, Under God.

We will never forget, nor will anyone else who lived through this day.